In the last few years I could notice a growth in DSLR usage and a boom of so called "professional photographer" market, actually for each DSLR that is sold a new "professional" is appearing out of nowhere.
To set things clear I am not a self called "professional photographer" and I don't do weddings, funerals and other life events (I did few times for my friends, for free, so I am not into "professional" side). I like to call myself a "hobby photographer" even if sometimes I have to use the camera for my job and in university I had to learn to use it (studio photography, filming techniques, green-screen filming, sound recording, post production etc.). I started with film cameras (not the point and shoot ones) from the analog era, without auto-focus, without any electronic help like in film SLR's, continued with compact cameras and compact digital cameras, then my first DSLR I bought just 6 months ago and three lenses, I agree I need more than one lens, one prime and two zoom lenses and I am happily using my old lenses from the analog cameras without any problem nor electronic support from the camera. I still I keep myself humble not throwing the name of "professional photographer" even if I am full of bad acquaintances that are in the "professional" league since they have an DSLR, and as a end note of my photographic activity I am not an old grumpy guy that can be in the league of gadget haters, I love gadgets but only when they relay worth the investment and I love cameras all types of them because I know how to use them to fulfill my task.
If you go somewhere as a tourist or is an interesting event in your city you will have two main categories of photographers, one depicted by the Japanese tourist - making quick photos with light-weight cameras (point and shoot or smartphones), snap and go style (actually many times this style of pictures are more personal and more expressive than a one-hour-setup-image); the other main group is depicted by the wanna-be-professionals - very expensive last generation DSLR, at least Manfrotto tripods (they say that they are the best - I don't know, maybe yes, maybe not, for sure two times more expensive than a similar quality product or even better), huge and more than very expensive lenses (especially the white ones from Canon, the L series) and always more than one lens pro body, usually standing in the way, disturbing other guys who are trying to take a shot (because they are the ones who can take the better image so f*** the others) and more posing than really taking pictures. I have seen them in very strange positions, just to show how professional they can be, and others around them taking notes of how it should be done and trying to mimic. Then, after those two categories you see in some corners or very distant, almost blending with the tourist, the real photographers. How I know they are the real? With that piece of crap camera? Just with one lens and many times a prime lens? Well, I am here to tell you in your face that those guys are the real photographers, because not the camera makes the photograph and they know where they are going, what they want and what they need for this.
DSLR fuzz
Well, everyone feels a bit artist inside and we are learned that professionals are doing great jobs because of professional equipment and as the equipment gets more expensive also the professionalism of the owner grows (not true, if you ask me). Beside this financial aspect and professionalism earned through supporting the economy, the female part of the population always feels that is more on the artistic side so they buy expensive gear to prove their professionalism while the male part can get more girls naked in front of the camera and hopefully in bed when they have a very expensive camera.
When you DON'T need a DSLR camera.
From my work experience and other stuff I did I can tell that you DON'T need an DSLR when:
1. Pay a lot just to use always the AUTO mode;
2. You have no idea or don't want to really learn f stops, exposure, iso and other mathematical expressions that help you to call yourself a "professional";
3. You know how to use at full potential a point and shoot or a compact camera;
4. The pictures you take are just to keep them as a memory on a hard drive (For this you really don't need a 22 MP camera and somewhere around more than few thousands in equipment);
5. You post your images on internet with a maximum size of 1024 x 768 - really!?!? for this you need 22MP?;
6. You call yourself a filmmaker but the target is only youtube;
7. When you want to do your passion and not to be a hipster.
When you NEED a DSLR camera:
1. Prints larger than A3 paper;
2. Using extreme focal length lenses;
3. Need to cut details of an image and still keep a good resolution.
DSLR myths:
Better image and colors - please let me remind you that the image quality is fully dependent on the sensor and more important on the image processor integrated in the camera, usually color, sharpness, and automatic white balance are a task of the processor. Ok, the sensor is also a bit responsible but a good sensor with a crap processor is worse than a crap sensor with a good processor. From my own experience I can tell that we all see different the same color, really, we interpret a bit different the colors so what for me is a perfect green fro you can be too green or not so perfect green. So what is the fuzz with the perfect color only the DSLR gives? Actually I have seen many point and shoot giving far better color than EOS 450D.
Better equipped than a compact camera - actually my first compact camera was bought in 2005 and was very expensive and a dslr at that time was 3-4 times more, just the body. So at a 1/3 of the price I got the DIGIC II processor that was fitted on EOS 5D and EOS 30D. The sensor was smaller and a bit cheaper than on the EOS line, but then again it was complete with 12x optical zoom 6.0-72.0mm 1:2.7-3.5 USM, film mode, twist and swivel tilt display and a macro focus distance almost equal with 0 mm. What can you wish for more at 1/3 price!?!? not to mention all modes existing on DSLR - M, P, Av, Tv and some many others.
Makes better pictures - camera does not make them, you make them, for sure one point and shoot with a price of 100 compared with one DSLR with a price of 1000 is not a good starting point and when you compare both cameras in auto mode probably you will get a better result for DSLR, so you are right, but if you learn to use a point and shoot or a compact camera for sure you get far better pictures than the hipster on auto mode with the latest DSLR.
Compact camera vs DSLR camera
Some are saying that nothing is better than a DSLR but sometimes is like going with the most exclusive Bentley or Rolls Royce to buy bread at the corner of your street. Really, it is like this!
For example I had to take some images for some newspaper ads, small ads not full A4, for this job a 5MP camera was far more than enough. The same camera was used for an A4 print, well I have to recognize that an 8MP or 12MP camera would have been better but I had just a 5MP one and still did a good job.
When you are on budget and you have, let's say, 1000 EUR and you don't intend to do large prints A3 and larger you can get a compact camera that has 18 or 22MP eventually some mega zoom with 20x optical zoom, same processor as the biggest brothers in DSLR class, maybe same sensor and the lens that covers at least 2 DSLR lenses. You remain with money for a good tripod and accessories like filters and depending on the compact camera and manufacturer some fish-eye and 2x tele converter and you will still have some money for a beer after. While for an DSLR you get stuck with a middle-low range one, maybe 2 lenses (the cheapest ones, for sure with a worse f stop than on the compact camera) and you don't remain with too much for a tripod, filters and other accessories, mainly you will have just the body and 2 of the cheapest lenses.
Meeting DSLR hipsters
I can't say or comment how an DSLR "professional photographer" looks at you when you appear with an 2005 compact camera with 5MP. I mean the guy with an iPhone near me was more professional, because his phone was newer than my camera. I really got some f**** off looks ... but who cares.
My biggest surprise was when I bought my DSLR, I felt that the world is mine, finally I will not be treated like shit by fellow hobbyists and maybe I can learn more. I had money just for an EOS 550D, was at offer with 2 lenses 18-55 and 75-300mm both the cheapest ones, and on top I said I still need a prime lens so I took the old nifty fifty 2.8, cheapest one. I can say that in my first day I was like ... ok, I got better lenses on my S2IS but I learned the limits of this lenses so is ok now even if I still complain about the quality. One day was a nice outdoor light exposition so I said is a must to test my camera but I decided to take just the good old 50mm, is bright enough so I don't need to take the tripod. I can just say that I felt worse than with my old camera. Was full of professionals there with cameras 3 times more expensive than mine and lenses 10 times more expensive. They all were studying first the camera model ... ok 550D sucks, oh my god he has just a 50mm!?!?!? F***** noob! and just putting their asses in front of my lens because they were professionals on the job .... I had to wait one to move and take a quick image until the next one was doing the same. They were all chatting with each other trying to find out if it worth to move from mkI to mkII or to replace his 1000EUR lens with the 2000EUR lens .... full of hipsters.
I have seen all from remote controls to the most expensive tripods, when the light was more than enough for a decent ISO and exposure time to permit handheld but since I am not a professional photographer, maybe I can't understand photography and the need of having the most expensive and useless equipment.
Still, I was amazed how they used only the display, never looking through the eye piece, I have problems taking pictures iPhone style, I need to have the camera at eye level and only through the eye sight, the display is for me only for the menu or in film mode. I was also amazed by the body positions I have seen, I mean I can see what I will have into the frame just looking at my lens, not by millimeter but I still know what I will have as result (maybe because I am not a Sunday photographer).
Conclusions?
Don't buy an DSLR just because is cool, buy it because you really need it, otherwise save money and buy an upper level compact or point and shoot will save you money and get almost the same results, learn to use the manual mode on it and you will have far better results than the guys with DSLR on auto.
And don't forget that you are the ones who are taking the picture, not the camera, if you know your camera you would be surprised of the quality you can get out of a small 150EUR point and shoot camera.
For holidays!?!? For sure 2 lenses and a big body are more attractive to thieves and harder to carry around than a small one. Only the big photo bag is a magnet for the opportunistic thief.
Have fun while taking pictures!
About Law of Attraction and other Get Rich things
All this fuzz with the law of attraction started with the movie The Secret, good movie and makes you to ask yourself some questions but it also started a huge fuzz on internet about this. Suddenly a lot of so called Dr. X started to appear and offer classes at high prices, I don't even know in which field they have a PhD or if is just a title they accorded themselves or some online PhD. Ok, the book and the movie are interesting, a bit to US commercial style for my taste but they are pleasant though. Then are all those wanna be self made people who are asking money for telling crap. When I see an Dr. Whatever from India talking about how he earns millions I want to throw up and I ask myself if the suit is rented and the pictures of his house and lifestyle he achieved are really his pictures or stolen from a luxury lifestyle website.
How does the law of attraction work?
I can say that you don't need a PhD to notice that it works at some degree, actually you just need a bit of life experience and introspection.
Let's take a relationship. You think every time your partner is out that he/she might cheat on you and you wait for hours only with this in mind. When he/she arrives home and is happy and smells like had a few drinks then you explode like a volcano ruining the night. Why? Because you thought that you are cheated and you can't stand the idea that the other came home happy while you are all grumpy, something must have happened.
You do this for one time, two times, three times, your partner gets anxious when comes home so enters in a defense mode, and becomes aggressive first when enters the door, then you are sure something bad happened that he/she can't even stand to see you, and again you ruin the nights. After some time your relationship it is not what it used to be so at one point your partner had enough of your cheating accuses and says "well, at least I know for what I am accused" and it happens to meet some other he/she, that he/she shows your partner respect and interest and ... they end-up doing some bed sports.
You attracted this to you? Yes, certainly! The law of attraction works! ... yes dummy because you were an idiot, is not any voodoo or magic behind, some secret kept hidden from you by evil greedy people.
There are a lot of sayings that are going to this direction, that what you are afraid of will happen, that you become what you think, that the dreams come true and so on, is no secret and it is just you who is doing stupid or good things.
Take action now!
Yes! Please pay thousands to some guy that will share the secrets of the universe with you. Here comes the funny part. Almost all who are talking about the law of attraction are emphasizing on making money and getting rich.
Have you ever asked yourself why? Why they talk almost only about money, goods and wealth? Why they don't talk about happiness or health or good life, why is all about money?
I can tell you why, because people are greedy, they will to pay thousands to learn how to earn money, the secrets of easy income. That's why the lottery is so popular. Still I haven't heard one saying that "I used the law of attraction to win the lottery". No, they make statistics of the numbers are more possible to be winning numbers and very few are just lucky guessing the right combination. Still you hear some fucking indian or pakistani guy talking a poor english telling you how to earn like him and how he earns millions per month. Yes, you idiot, he earns like this because he is selling a shit seminar for 2000 USD! (I always wondered why the prices are always in USD and not other currency) So imagine he has 100 idiots per month, he lives in a shit-hole in India or Pakistan and for living there with 200 per month is already the king of the neighborhood.
Actually I had the curiosity to read some of them, sorry guys I hadn't paid your shit pdf files, I just have my ways to get them, pdf files in worth of some hundreds of USD. Only crap! How to make money, and be positive ... yeah right, worthy lecture.
Another funny thing is that all those secret of the universe holders are addressing the matter to business guys. Like if you have a company you can earn more and deserve more. Yes is true, as a company you can always earn more. But what about us? the lesser people, the foot-folk? Actually they have no answers for this, just maybe meditate more, think positive, find the opportunity and open a business. If everyone will have a business who will work for my business? I meditate for 10 years on how to get rich still nothing happened, no voodoo, I still need to have a regular job. Then I pay you 2000 USD to find out that I should open a business and meditate more. Doh! Ok, maybe I should open a bullshitter business, call myself Dr. Ciufu and earn thousands from my toilet philosophy ... could worth!
But really works!
Yes I know, I had some moments in my life when it worked like magic, could be just coincidence or God or universe or Allah or Buddha or Yahweh, call it how you like, decided to help me.
For example I wished to have an Kawasaki KLR 650, was available only to import from US, I had my "visualization board", how they like to call it today when you pay 2000 or more to find out the secrets of life, actually was on my desktop wallpaper. And after some time a friend of mine decided to sell her "just bought" Kawasaki KLR. But guess what, was not the last model, was from 1990, was KLR 600 not 650. Did it work? Maybe was just a coincidence.
I wished to move from my house and have my own one apartment, did not had the right money and my payment was not enough to take the required amount from bank. Out of nowhere appeared someone who offered to lend me some money without interest, so I could take the apartment. Did it work? This time, for sure.
I wished to study at a certain university in another country, I made it but after some time I remained without money and no job and while I was preparing to accept the defeat and pack my stuff a miracle happened, my landlord, the owner of the apartment were I live, offered me a deal to pay the rent after I finish my studies and got me a job at some company. Did it work? For sure!
I wished a girl to love me and have a relationship like you see only in the movies or read only in books, after some bad experiences when I said I don't want to get attached or something like this, is better alone. And ... yes I found her without being out to look for girls and out of the strangest situation, we are happy even if there are some hundreds of kilometers between, and some even said that what happened is only a once in a lifetime miracle and I can consider this a gift from the gods. Did it work? At the moment I can say yes, but time will tell.
I wished to have a well paid job during my studies, to live and pay my rent. After three years I am still searching. Did it work? For sure not!
Last thoughts.
I'd say that we bring upon us what we deserve in the eyes of the others, and what comes to us is mostly related to how we act in the society and how we are seen.
If I was asking my landlord to help me, maybe he could help me but he saw that I try to do my best on my own so he decided to help. On the other side of the example is a guy I work for, he knows my financial situation because he pays me. He knows that I have a motorcycle from my landlord, I have a car to use when I need, also from my landlord, but he does not want to pay me a cent more even if he sees that someone else is investing in me. And I think is all about how the others are seeing you. My landlord sees me as a future investment, so he helps me to reach my goals while he knows he will get his money back and that I deserve a better life, while the other guy sees me as a cheap asset that needs money so will take any shit, working at 2am in the morning or Sundays or even on Christmas, the guy that you call when he is on holidays and throw him a pile of work that is to be done ASAP.
Does this law really works? I say that depends on the people you meet, because I will probably help someone that will be in the situation I am now, because it will somehow remember me that once I was there and I got helped. But this depends on the character of the others. You meet some nice people they will help you realize your dreams, you meet ass-holes they will keep you in the mud so that they can take more air and more from you. I don't see any possibility for a car to materialize itself in front of my door and I wish to have one more than any crap get rich coach can imagine, I see no roadblocks between me and my car but it is still not at my door.
Then why all the fuzz? Because some door to door salesman tries to get rich with your wish to get rich!
I would believe all this crap when all the information will be free, you know, is enough for everyone they say. If is enough for everyone ... then you don't need to make a living out of this get a life out of something else and preach this for free, or better let the people who really got rich after your crap seminar to pay you, as a thank you note. This would be fair! Until then is good that the world is full of idiots and better ... idiots with money that are willing to pay you.
I have seen one indian rented suit Dr. X who was presenting a navy seals movie to support his crap theory. DUDE!?!? WTF!?! What has navy seals training to do with money? Should I get through hell week or what? How much crap we can take from this kind of guys? If is a secret they know is that you can get rich wen your target group is "Idiot people. rich idiot people, greedy rich idiot people", rent a suit, act as you are God walking on the earth and have all answers, any question you receive should be answered with as more hot air you can produce and be full of shit ... and they will offer you their money and maybe some blow-jobs too.
Till the next time!
Strange human thinking - different half of measures II
Another good example of human stupidity is how racism and political correctness are judged ... yeah, right, you see them in action every day.
Lets take some examples, real ones.
1. A drunk white guy shouts in the middle of the street that the whites are superior race, you call this "white power" and other stuff that can fall into this category.
2. A black guy shouts in the middle of the street, african power, white blood weak blood and some other black empowerment things.
Who is the racist here? Note that the scenario is happening in western europe, home of the white people, home of the anti-racism stuff, fear of extreme and good home of antifa and political correctness, white neighborhood in mid day.
Well, actually in case 1 this is happening: some black guys and muslims rally against the white guy to teach him a lesson for being racist, some white trash antifa losers who are living on streets join the forces, some other white guys are swearing and tell him to fuck off, finally police arrives and takes into custody the supposed radical right extremist for further investigations.
In case 2 some brothers are cheering their brother's courage and somehow they take part at this, some muslims get offended because they are the superior race, this is what the prophet told them, but they continue their way and the white guys are passing by like nothing happens, except some hippies and antifa who are bravely scanning the area waiting for a white guy to say something nasty so they can start a fight. No police involved.
Actually ... looking from a neutral position both are "racist" according to the actual thinking and then both deserve the same treatment, the only difference is their skin color. I would say they are both proud of their inheritance and are exercising a fundamental right, the right to have an opinion, and this is their opinion. Since when is a sin to be proud that you are white but totally legit when you are black? Where is the equal sign? We try to be equal and have the same rights, right?
Ok, this scenario happened in western europe, white neighborhood. Let's move it to an immigrant neighborhood inhabited by non caucasians: case 1: the white guy would have suffered severe injures until the police arrived. Case 2 would be a fiesta and eventually with a bit of luck would have been a riot and a huge fight with police and a hunt of white trash.
In an eastern european country, the white guy would have been ignored and maybe some drunks would become his fans, while for the black guy ... he would have been told to go the fuck back in his country if he considers this, here is on their ground.
In africa, the white guy probably killed by the furious masses, the black guy ignored and some drunken fans.
Why this difference? don't tell me that us the white people are tolerant and evolved because you fall in the "racist" category. And I ask why this difference of attitude in western world, the holy ground of liberty and right to express your opinion.
Now political correctness, another "please go and never come back" thing.
Case 1. White guy starts to fuck Jesus in train, He is put to respect by the entire train, believers and non believers, because you know, is not nice to hurt the other's feelings.
Case 2. Muslim guy starts to fuck Jesus, Mary and all the christian saints by alphabet. Ok, he does not know too many so he starts to swear and curse all christians. The public resolution: this circus lasted for half an hour, at least then I had to get out of the train, but the guy remained there. With one exception, one old lady who kindly asked that guy to stop swearing, some time after 10 minutes or so, and she was called a christian whore and got her entire relatives dead or alive fucked ... no one said anything, nor called the police.
So ... where is the difference? Again skin color and muslim religion, please don't hurt their feelings on christian soil, let them treat you like they treat you when you go to their countries, like an infidel, not worthy trash. Not even other muslims got annoyed even if Jesus is considered to be a prophet by their religion, oh yeah fuck the prophet, they are infidels and deserve to die.
Political correctness and jobs.
Me and my buddy, both in a country with other language than english. He black, I white, he Africa, I Europe. Good. Time to make some money and get a job.
We applied mainly at the same jobs because we got similar skills and the same field so we were announcing each other which jobs we found, sharing the link and sending our applications. We did not know the country language so all the applications were in english. Again, I Europe, him Africa, we said that I will be the first one to get a job since he requires work permit and employers are running when comes to extra papers and take the simplest option.
What do you think? For all the answers I had to use google translate while he had 90% of them in english, while for the rest of them (10%) he complained that they are racists.
Finally? He got a job before me and double paid, with all the hassle of making work permit just to prove they are a multi-cultural company. I say the heck with all this. Since that day I still apply to jobs and I am still too white for them to take me. And is not qualification or work experience that is missing, just the local language.
Political correctness and social interactions.
I go to a party or club, people approach, they take note that they should speak english and they leave. My buddy arrives, yeah the black guy, people are afraid to leave so they chat in english.
Girls, another good experience. My buddy does not care if they are ugly, big or hairy as long as they have a wet hole to park his log. Although now he started to become picky, at the beginning nothing mattered more than the Bermuda triangle. Girls are running from me like hell when comes to english or they start to argue with me in their native language that I am just fooling them, because I must be one of them, I look like them so why this bullshit with english. And to make things worse, I understand their language but I did not had with whom to practice so they speak and I answer in english ... so I am a freak. My buddy comes, "Hey, I am from Africa" and I am like ... "no shit! I thought you are from Norway!" and then english english, sex and english. He also gets free drinks from the bartenders in a way to say "ok, I did a good deed for some undeveloped country".
Actually, after three years in another country I started to really feel the effects of "positive discrimination". Who invented this term positive discrimination? Is discrimination, end of story, is not positive or negative! But, oh, we like to split things and to judge with different points of view. There is not pleasant for my buddy or for me that we are among foreigners, we both miss home and we both feel the need to interact, the difference is again the skin and the way people relate to it.
In our first year of study he even got presents from International Student Service Center, because "aww, he is so far from home! he makes the holidays here alone!" So what? also did I and the other european students, but none of us got anything.
In the end this political correctness is just another form of discrimination, but because we like to consider the discrimination just skin related, they laugh at me when I say that this is discrimination, and I get some answers in the area oh, no you are like us, but we don't want your buddy to feel discriminated, ok so I am white I can't complain, but he can and you want to be sure that he does not complain.
Looking from the other side I ask myself why this people don't feel offended for being "special treatment" like they have a handicap or something. They go, make hunger strike for 2 days and get a visa, social help and other benefits, I go, do it for one week, they get enough of me, call the police and solve the case.
I think everyone should have the right to the same treatment. If he is proud of his white skin, black skin, his viking ancestors, the owners of african plains, bedouin, mujaheddin, owner of the great wall and so on .... we all have the same rights. Judge it with the equal sign.
Don't put the stamp racist or nazi on a white guy because is proud but a "back to the roots" cheer on the others.
Don't judge a guy that deserves less compared with other, we are all human beings, we are all proud of our family, our home land, our history.
I look for example at USA in contradiction with Western Europe. In USA you can have underpants with US flag, if you put out the US flag you are a patriot, and is tolerated even in europe. But when an european takes out his flag then he is a racist, except when the national team plays, then is ok. Even US citizens have a problem with other flags out "he is a racist or what!?!?" and my answer is "hello! You are dressed all in US flag, what's your problem? Can't I be a patriot like you?".
Maybe is time to ask yourselves some questions.
Strange human thinking - different half of measures
For some time I wonder and ask myself how that us, the human beings, judge always with two half of measures.
For example we say: You can't take a life, you are not God to decide about life and death and to decide if someone deserves to die.
Ok, agree with you! BUT for God's sake then how can you decide if someone deserves to live? For example saving someone who is almost dying or already dead, bringing him/her back to life.
Oh, I get it, life is cool, someone in history decided that life is cool but for our ancestors was a real honor to be sacrificed for some whatever Crops God. In Africa are tribes that are still letting the weak ones to go and die, like in the wild. We, the "civilized world" are saying that this is no way, they must be saved and bring them our civilization and manners, by the way which manners?!?!
So you say you don't feel God enough to take a life but you suddenly feel God enough to save a life - half measure.
Cuteness: Oh, this is my favorite! You see a nice squirrel and you pee on your pants with cuteness, you see it's kin, the rat, you jump onto the closest chair shouting that someone should kill it and kill it NOW!
Cats, another example, you see one and suddenly you are in love "oh how cute", the cat is chasing it's tail "oh, it is terribly cute", the cat enters in a chips bag "oh, adorably cute!" ... now you see a dog "cute", dog enters bag "ah, maybe is not so smart, but at least is cute", dog chasing tail "this dog is dumb!"
Even rodent lovers prefer a guinea pig instead of a rat or a white lab mouse instead of a common gray one.
Why? is beauty so important? If you are ugly and live in sewers you need to die but if you have fluffy tail or ass kissing attitude you deserve a life? Wake up people! You realize that the first hours of your life you looked like shit? Should someone killed you because you were such a nasty looking newborn?
Womanizer vs Whore: Keep in mind that I am a male but for fuck's sake why a woman who changes men like her dirty underwear is a whore, every one who does not want to show her the ceiling is hating her, sometimes even the ones who are willing to park their car still are thinking nasty about her that she is a bitch, she is a disgrace bla bla ... you know it, you do it everyday. "Who? that whore who slept with the entire class? What a bitch!" And this is equally judged my male and female population!
Now we take the male whore, here we judge him a bit different. The females are calling him a womanizer but still they are willing to be around such a successful male, if he nailed so many girls and dropped them next day ... well, then he is worthy, knows how to stick a log into the fire. "I know he loves girls, but I will show him that I can be the one to make him change", or "Oh, he is so experienced with girls, why not? He knows how to deal with a female" ... yeah right, use you, like the whore does with men. Ok, if the ladies are looking a bit weary but sill charmed at the male whore, then the male population cheers his deeds of bravery, his long list of sheets he was into, the money brought to condoms industry and probably without knowing they are also cheering the fact that he just screwed their partner / wife / girlfriend.
I say whores are whores gender independent, low characters, heart breakers, without self control around opposite sex, selfish trophy hunters. But then again it applies only with half measure. Or you can love whores ... but then again with half measure.
Try to think outside your box! Ask yourself questions, look from other angle, change the perspective, argue with yourself, doubt the morality and immorality definition but don't do it just with half measures!
Kindergarten, first cigarette and discovering electricity
After Ciufu survived the first age of exploration is time for the second one ...
Years were passing and I got to Kindergarten where I discovered that in a communist state is not good to have a german name in the family. I raised being called a nazi brat. And since I was a bit of crazy kid and very stubborn, yes born in same day with the most hated man of our times but many years after, still the astrology doesn't lie when says that the people born on that day are stubborn.
The bright minds of communism decided to put me into submission and cut my desire to lead and stubbornness by playing second world war games where I was forced to be always on the looser side, bad for them, I was commanding my troops fearless but always being forced to die, not to mention that we were always outnumbered. So I studied how to mimic a german helmet with my "pioneer" cap, they were making me angrier day by day by forcing me to be on the looser side. All until one day when I failed to fall under submission and started a fight to win it for good. I don't know what my parents were told but after that day ... no more war games.
Lesson to learn? Never force someone into submission, one day he will say "enough is enough". And you make them grow opposite, so instead of worshiping the good soviet state I was fantasizing on a different result.
First cigarette
My father was a smoker, and I got a toy ... a train, more exactly an old steam train. As a kid I was seeing at TV steam trains and I had a toy one. The one from TV produces smoke, mine not. So I have a problem, I need my toy to look like the one on TV.
My father produces smoke with that thing he puts fire on it! Oh, ok, I know! I should take one and my train will have steam!
My problem was that the cigarette pack was heavily guarded ... all until one day, the day they brought chicken at the grocery store. If you didn't live communism you can't understand this! The day when some meat (more than claws, heads and necks) was available at the grocery the entire neighborhood was in red alert. All the inhabitants able to walk were forming a huge line and because the early bird gets the worm was a race to get quicker at the line. Because sometimes you were staying in the line for 4-5 hours for nothing, because was not enough it was a real race since the moment they were seeing the truck coming. And another nice thing in the communism was that were actually 2 lines, one in the front for all the "mortals" and one in the back for the guys with "relations", knowing someone from the store or being in the system (party, police, political police, informers and other privileged categories). Usually I was taken also at the line, because we could get more ... the more you were at the line more food could have been taken, because it was limited per person.
That special day, I was sick and the alarm was sounded, the entire neighborhood was running at the line, so did my family ... but in that rush the cigarette pack remained behind and unguarded. Lucky me! Now my dream of smoking train could come true, so it did, I worked some time to light the cigarette ... at that time I wasn't into smoking so I missed the nice part of getting dizzy but I got a smoking train. What I didn't knew was that plastic is melting at high temperatures produced by the cigarette. Well, I was introduced into the melting notion too, and I forgot to mention that one cigarette was cool but more smoke could have been better so I decided that a number of three could do it.
Soon my smoking train was to become a super smoking train because of melting plastic! What a day, so proud! Actually I had to destroy my train after that because my parents would have noticed is melted so it had to suffer a terrible crash!
Lessons learned? Yes, plastic melts, but even with the loss of my train I still remember the joy of having a smoking train at least for 5 minutes, to look like on TV. My parents will be so proud of me! NOT
Electricity
Same day with smoking train, the line was taking hours, so, after the rush of having a smoking train and having it destroyed to cover my tracks. I discovered another treasure, my dad's electronic parts, after playing with resistors and other integrated circuits, considering them just bugs I discovered a plug with a cut wire. Ok, nice, this thing goes into the outlet. Good! Now is in the outlet, why it does not to anything? No, don't touch it! Father and mother are saying to keep away from outlets. Well is in the outlet, nothing happened, me happy now I can touch it! Ouch! It hurts! Yep right, I touched it and it hurt big time, but what do you think?!?! I tried it for the second time, just to be sure ... and then for another hour I was afraid to unplug it but I was more afraid that they will find out I played with the forbidden things. Out of two fears the smallest prevailed.
That day I learned another lesson, that electricity hurts and that there is a good thing to listen to my parents when they say that is not ok to do something. Fortunately, as a kid you tend to forget quick that you promised yourself to be a good kid and listen to your parents.
Years were passing and I got to Kindergarten where I discovered that in a communist state is not good to have a german name in the family. I raised being called a nazi brat. And since I was a bit of crazy kid and very stubborn, yes born in same day with the most hated man of our times but many years after, still the astrology doesn't lie when says that the people born on that day are stubborn.
The bright minds of communism decided to put me into submission and cut my desire to lead and stubbornness by playing second world war games where I was forced to be always on the looser side, bad for them, I was commanding my troops fearless but always being forced to die, not to mention that we were always outnumbered. So I studied how to mimic a german helmet with my "pioneer" cap, they were making me angrier day by day by forcing me to be on the looser side. All until one day when I failed to fall under submission and started a fight to win it for good. I don't know what my parents were told but after that day ... no more war games.
Lesson to learn? Never force someone into submission, one day he will say "enough is enough". And you make them grow opposite, so instead of worshiping the good soviet state I was fantasizing on a different result.
First cigarette
My father was a smoker, and I got a toy ... a train, more exactly an old steam train. As a kid I was seeing at TV steam trains and I had a toy one. The one from TV produces smoke, mine not. So I have a problem, I need my toy to look like the one on TV.
My father produces smoke with that thing he puts fire on it! Oh, ok, I know! I should take one and my train will have steam!
My problem was that the cigarette pack was heavily guarded ... all until one day, the day they brought chicken at the grocery store. If you didn't live communism you can't understand this! The day when some meat (more than claws, heads and necks) was available at the grocery the entire neighborhood was in red alert. All the inhabitants able to walk were forming a huge line and because the early bird gets the worm was a race to get quicker at the line. Because sometimes you were staying in the line for 4-5 hours for nothing, because was not enough it was a real race since the moment they were seeing the truck coming. And another nice thing in the communism was that were actually 2 lines, one in the front for all the "mortals" and one in the back for the guys with "relations", knowing someone from the store or being in the system (party, police, political police, informers and other privileged categories). Usually I was taken also at the line, because we could get more ... the more you were at the line more food could have been taken, because it was limited per person.
That special day, I was sick and the alarm was sounded, the entire neighborhood was running at the line, so did my family ... but in that rush the cigarette pack remained behind and unguarded. Lucky me! Now my dream of smoking train could come true, so it did, I worked some time to light the cigarette ... at that time I wasn't into smoking so I missed the nice part of getting dizzy but I got a smoking train. What I didn't knew was that plastic is melting at high temperatures produced by the cigarette. Well, I was introduced into the melting notion too, and I forgot to mention that one cigarette was cool but more smoke could have been better so I decided that a number of three could do it.
Soon my smoking train was to become a super smoking train because of melting plastic! What a day, so proud! Actually I had to destroy my train after that because my parents would have noticed is melted so it had to suffer a terrible crash!
Lessons learned? Yes, plastic melts, but even with the loss of my train I still remember the joy of having a smoking train at least for 5 minutes, to look like on TV. My parents will be so proud of me! NOT
Electricity
Same day with smoking train, the line was taking hours, so, after the rush of having a smoking train and having it destroyed to cover my tracks. I discovered another treasure, my dad's electronic parts, after playing with resistors and other integrated circuits, considering them just bugs I discovered a plug with a cut wire. Ok, nice, this thing goes into the outlet. Good! Now is in the outlet, why it does not to anything? No, don't touch it! Father and mother are saying to keep away from outlets. Well is in the outlet, nothing happened, me happy now I can touch it! Ouch! It hurts! Yep right, I touched it and it hurt big time, but what do you think?!?! I tried it for the second time, just to be sure ... and then for another hour I was afraid to unplug it but I was more afraid that they will find out I played with the forbidden things. Out of two fears the smallest prevailed.
That day I learned another lesson, that electricity hurts and that there is a good thing to listen to my parents when they say that is not ok to do something. Fortunately, as a kid you tend to forget quick that you promised yourself to be a good kid and listen to your parents.
Ciufu's first hospital memory
If Ciufu does not remember too much of his early years, except nude photos in a forgotten family album, he sure still does remember his first hospital experience and his luck to be still alive ...
From my first years of life I can't remember too much, just a dark smelly hospital .... and that I don't like small child smell when they are too many at one place probably because I had to be "institutionalized" before kindergarten. Those were the times when the proud working class should work not stay at home with they new born child. So a solution was found, the communist party created a institution where all kids should be dumped in the morning and piked-up in the afternoon while their proud working slaves were at work paying war debts to Mother Russia.
I have no memory from those times, probably is better this way, I don't want to know how many hours I was crying before someone would have cleaned my shit nor how I was treated. But I do remember the hospital. I was there because of another hospital and my own way of explore life, conquer new territories and proving my skills in controlling my body, at an age a child is stable as a drunken man. So I was told that I was exploring a new way to get on the top of the chair, that special chair for small kids, with steps. So I was now a proud member of the table where adults were sitting. Soon I learned to climb it on my own, oh what an achievement! This was not enough for me! I wanted to conquer the world and my chair trying to climb it from the side. My parents were busy preparing the meal so I took advantage of that freedom to try my new idea and I did it with one downfall ... I was down ... and on my flight I hit the radiator with my head, must have been painful. Lucky me I still don't remember this part.
I was taken to a hospital to be cleaned, because was a mess and got some stitches, lucky me! My parents returned home with their pot of gold (me) and their souls were relieved that the little gold pot is healthy and ok. What they didn't knew was that in that hospital was a big infection with some Streptococcus bla bla ... well they were soon to find out. After one week I was still complaining that it hurts there and was looking like a little infection, my mother with the love of a mother didn't head the heart to push it to see what is there and the doctors were saying that is normal, maybe I touch myself too often so is just a small infection ... take more antibiotics. But after few days my father did not had any more patience and decided to press it out to see what the heck was inside and this is what I remember, seeing black, hearing a swoosh, huge pain and my father shouting that they should call the ambulance now ....
I ended up in other hospital, so my parents were congratulated for doing this, later I found out that the pus sprung to the ceiling ... yeah nice image ... but somehow doing this to me saved my life. The infection was eating the bone, so until today I have a hole in my head where the bone is very very thin, never recovered.
If until now was the "yuck" part, now begins the cool part. I was in hospital, I stayed there for some good weeks, I don't remember them well but I was probably the healthiest kid in that area, except the fact I got a hole in my head and I had to do penicillin 4 times a day for 6 weeks. I know that it hurts but after a while you get used with it. The rest of the kids were mainly with severe injures. One of them got hit by a bus and they had to replace the skin on his back with skin from other parts of the body, so he was more surgery than ok, and some plastered members. Every day he was supposed to go for cleaning his wounds with something that was smelling like gasoline and I presume was burning like it too. Because the poor kid was shouting for hours, because usually this thing was taking a very long time ... sometimes I can still hear his shouts but as years are passing by his shouts are becoming more and more supportable. Otherwise he was a very nice kid, very quiet almost not talking but I presume it was because he was suffering a lot.
Days were passing by, I was getting used with the shouts that were from the morning and close to noon, I was better and I wanted to play, I was feeling like in a field trip. Without parents except visiting hours ... freedom to do stupid things play with medical equipment ... but unfortunately guarded by a nurse that was looking like a Russian weightlifter, oh what a bitch! And with a loud mouth too! She was shouting worse than the roadkill kid, I tend to think that she was able to scare a grizzly bear.
All until one day when a new kid came, was bigger than us, we were something around 3 years he was 7 or 8. I don't know what he had but he was able to walk and loved us, spoiled us had fun with us, I remember he was walking me on his shoulders and let me to do all the stupid things while guarding me from the soviet beast. He was reading us stories and even after the "lights off" time he was talking with us, we were having pillow fights and other childish things. Oh yes, and I got access to his sweets, maybe the best part of our short friendship. But his behavior didn't escaped unnoticed so our evil guardian made a habit in shouting at him even when he was doing nothing and always telling him that he is the biggest and should behave responsible not to spoil us.
Whatever .... what should do a bunch of kids sitting in a hospital if not playing around, then what?
Looking behind I still think sometimes at the "roadkill" kid and what have happened with him and how he passed over that horrible experience and also at the older kid that made my stay in hospital my only memory from that age to be a good one. And I know that from that day I wished for a brother ... but I got a sister and to make the things worse a little sister that you can't play with because is crying or she is playing with dolls when you are at the age of riding a bicycle.
Exploring age? Oh yeah, the nicest of all!
Dear parents please let your kids explore, even if they can hurt themselves ... well, I don't say let them explore the chainsaw or knives, they will explore them anyway during their life. But let them discover their limits as long as they don't endanger their life.
From my first years of life I can't remember too much, just a dark smelly hospital .... and that I don't like small child smell when they are too many at one place probably because I had to be "institutionalized" before kindergarten. Those were the times when the proud working class should work not stay at home with they new born child. So a solution was found, the communist party created a institution where all kids should be dumped in the morning and piked-up in the afternoon while their proud working slaves were at work paying war debts to Mother Russia.
I have no memory from those times, probably is better this way, I don't want to know how many hours I was crying before someone would have cleaned my shit nor how I was treated. But I do remember the hospital. I was there because of another hospital and my own way of explore life, conquer new territories and proving my skills in controlling my body, at an age a child is stable as a drunken man. So I was told that I was exploring a new way to get on the top of the chair, that special chair for small kids, with steps. So I was now a proud member of the table where adults were sitting. Soon I learned to climb it on my own, oh what an achievement! This was not enough for me! I wanted to conquer the world and my chair trying to climb it from the side. My parents were busy preparing the meal so I took advantage of that freedom to try my new idea and I did it with one downfall ... I was down ... and on my flight I hit the radiator with my head, must have been painful. Lucky me I still don't remember this part.
I was taken to a hospital to be cleaned, because was a mess and got some stitches, lucky me! My parents returned home with their pot of gold (me) and their souls were relieved that the little gold pot is healthy and ok. What they didn't knew was that in that hospital was a big infection with some Streptococcus bla bla ... well they were soon to find out. After one week I was still complaining that it hurts there and was looking like a little infection, my mother with the love of a mother didn't head the heart to push it to see what is there and the doctors were saying that is normal, maybe I touch myself too often so is just a small infection ... take more antibiotics. But after few days my father did not had any more patience and decided to press it out to see what the heck was inside and this is what I remember, seeing black, hearing a swoosh, huge pain and my father shouting that they should call the ambulance now ....
I ended up in other hospital, so my parents were congratulated for doing this, later I found out that the pus sprung to the ceiling ... yeah nice image ... but somehow doing this to me saved my life. The infection was eating the bone, so until today I have a hole in my head where the bone is very very thin, never recovered.
If until now was the "yuck" part, now begins the cool part. I was in hospital, I stayed there for some good weeks, I don't remember them well but I was probably the healthiest kid in that area, except the fact I got a hole in my head and I had to do penicillin 4 times a day for 6 weeks. I know that it hurts but after a while you get used with it. The rest of the kids were mainly with severe injures. One of them got hit by a bus and they had to replace the skin on his back with skin from other parts of the body, so he was more surgery than ok, and some plastered members. Every day he was supposed to go for cleaning his wounds with something that was smelling like gasoline and I presume was burning like it too. Because the poor kid was shouting for hours, because usually this thing was taking a very long time ... sometimes I can still hear his shouts but as years are passing by his shouts are becoming more and more supportable. Otherwise he was a very nice kid, very quiet almost not talking but I presume it was because he was suffering a lot.
Days were passing by, I was getting used with the shouts that were from the morning and close to noon, I was better and I wanted to play, I was feeling like in a field trip. Without parents except visiting hours ... freedom to do stupid things play with medical equipment ... but unfortunately guarded by a nurse that was looking like a Russian weightlifter, oh what a bitch! And with a loud mouth too! She was shouting worse than the roadkill kid, I tend to think that she was able to scare a grizzly bear.
All until one day when a new kid came, was bigger than us, we were something around 3 years he was 7 or 8. I don't know what he had but he was able to walk and loved us, spoiled us had fun with us, I remember he was walking me on his shoulders and let me to do all the stupid things while guarding me from the soviet beast. He was reading us stories and even after the "lights off" time he was talking with us, we were having pillow fights and other childish things. Oh yes, and I got access to his sweets, maybe the best part of our short friendship. But his behavior didn't escaped unnoticed so our evil guardian made a habit in shouting at him even when he was doing nothing and always telling him that he is the biggest and should behave responsible not to spoil us.
Whatever .... what should do a bunch of kids sitting in a hospital if not playing around, then what?
Looking behind I still think sometimes at the "roadkill" kid and what have happened with him and how he passed over that horrible experience and also at the older kid that made my stay in hospital my only memory from that age to be a good one. And I know that from that day I wished for a brother ... but I got a sister and to make the things worse a little sister that you can't play with because is crying or she is playing with dolls when you are at the age of riding a bicycle.
Exploring age? Oh yeah, the nicest of all!
Dear parents please let your kids explore, even if they can hurt themselves ... well, I don't say let them explore the chainsaw or knives, they will explore them anyway during their life. But let them discover their limits as long as they don't endanger their life.
Ciufu's early years
As any other kid in this world Ciufu arrived naked and according to good old medicine practices the doctor or the nurse were shaking his ass off until he started to scream. They say that this is a sign of a healthy baby, I say this is a sign of a scared baby but in the end they have the medical studies and their opinion matters.
His arrival on this planet was on a nice day of April, more exactly on 20th of April, Führer's day as he was to find out later, for the moment he did not know even where he was so details like this were not of great importance. And so a life and a journey started ....
I don't remember much of my early years, except short stories usually told at family meetings where are usually also some "not so family" guests. This stories are usually told with big love and somehow making my grandparents or parents to live again those moments and making me feel uncomfortable and all ends when they decide to take out the family album. You know, that kind of album with your first pictures. Remember them now? If not, please let me refresh your memory
Yeah, that's right, this kind of images! When you still look like a weird mix between a very old person and a baby and except your parents and grandparents who are looking at you like you are the next Messiah, some Sunshine ray or the Holly Grail ... the other ones are saying in their mind ... fuck yeah, this is an ugly baby but somehow they produce sounds like "Oh, is a sweet baby! The most beautiful baby I have ever seen!" Yeah right! Shut your cakehole! You tell this at every ugly baby picture you see! And then comes the most amazing part, they start to guess with whom the baby looks like. "Oh I can see it has the beauty of his mother! And the forehead of his father!" Oh, yeah ... and mother and father are glad and content, the small kid got their looks. But they don't see that this could be true if the father is a Klingon and the mother some Egyptian Mummy.
After you get over the embarrassing moment when you see some ugly small piece of meat, which by the way is you in the first hour of life, that does not resemble with you today or with your parents and yet still everyone insists on that image that you got whatever part of your ugly face from one of your parents, then you move one step forward. Presenting yourself naked in front of the audience, is not in the "Book of good manners" but is in your family album, so now you can let everyone admiring your genitals! Priceless!
So this is how it works with the first two or three years of life, you have no memory but you have nude pictures, pictures when you are sick, pictures with silly hats, pictures where you are dressed weird and pictures with other kids that you don't know nor any other member of your family can remember their names.
Welcome to my World!
Hi, I am Ciufu and I will introduce you into my world!
Please let me introduce myself. I was born in the early 80's in one of the countries that were loosing the 2nd world war and after the Russians and Americans have decided on a map the faith of the world, that country was under Soviet influence.
Well, after almost 36 years since the war was over, the gods decided to send my ass there and start a wonderful journey, or at least an interesting one.
Please let me introduce myself. I was born in the early 80's in one of the countries that were loosing the 2nd world war and after the Russians and Americans have decided on a map the faith of the world, that country was under Soviet influence.
Well, after almost 36 years since the war was over, the gods decided to send my ass there and start a wonderful journey, or at least an interesting one.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)